Winter Olympics Drinking Game
The next time the Winter Olympic Games (or Olympic Winter Games, as the IOC
prefers to call them) comes, here's a little competition that may help to
make your viewing more pleasurable.
First, lay in a stock of your favorite beverage.
Then, turn on CBS and observe the following rules:
-
Take one drink every time a CBS announcer invites you to "share a moment
with the world."
-
Take one drink every time snowboarding highlights are backed up by rock-and-roll
guitar/heavy metal headbanger music.
-
Take one drink every time a female athlete is described as "America's _____ing
sweetheart." Take an extra drink if the athlete in question is "American's
curling sweetheart."
-
Clap your hands and take one drink every time reference is made to "the
revolutionary new clap skate" being used in speed skating.
-
Take one drink every time figure skating commentator Scott Hamilton shouts
that a skater "NAILED!!" a jump.
-
Take one drink every time you hear a hockey announcer shout, "He shoots...he
scores!" Take two drinks if you're watching women's hockey and you hear,
"She shoots...she scores!"
-
Take one drink every time CBS promises to get "up close and personal" with
an athlete.
-
Take one drink every time a skater is presented with a bouquet of flowers.
-
Take one drink every time America's quest for its first medal in luge is
mentioned. Take an extra drink if America actually happens to win a medal
in luge.
-
Take one drink and sigh, "That's good, mon" every time reference is made
to the Jamaican bobsled team.
-
Take one drink every time the REAL Olympic theme (not that CBS fabrication)
is heard.
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