(Mike's in the theater already. Bob and the bots join him.)
Bob: This is sad. This
is very sad!
Tom: Is this going to turn
into a parody of the Rocky moives?
Bob: Ok Matrix, let's do this.
Glitch, teleport
Issa: ...And in 10 seconds,
Bob, Matrix and Austin were on their way
Tom: He's not even trying to tell us where they're going...!
Austin: Who is this guy????
Mike: It's the one armed
man!
Tom: Mike, he has two
arms.
Bob: (Announcer voice)
And don't forget the removable legs for easy cleaning.
Matrix: That's Megabyte, the most deadly virus in the Net
Crow: I thought Daemon
was the most deadly virus in the Net...
Tom: No, that's most likely
to "Love you, infect you, use you, then leave you" virus of the
Net.
Crow: Oh yeah. My
mistake.
Megabyte: Well, so you have come guardians but be sure, this will be your last visit in G-Prime
Mike: Hey look guys! We've
got a location in Mainframe!
Tom: (British accent)
And there was much rejoicing...
Crow & Bob:
(unenthusiastically) Yay.
Bob: I don't thing so,
Megabyte!
Megabyte: Well, Bob, after
all those years, you finaly think with your brain. Now you'll
die!
Issa: ...And Megabyte starts attacking Bob and our heros.
Tom: Hey...Matrix isn't
my hero...
Crow: Mine
neither.
Bob: Austin isn't
mine.
All: (cheering)
Go Megabyte!
60 nanos later and after distroying half off G-Prime, they're all half dead.
Mike: They're only half
dead. There's a difference between half dead and mostly dead.
There is only one thing you can do when they're half dead.
Tom: What's
that?
Mike: Make them all
dead and then go through their pockets for loose change.
They can't fight anymore, but Austin on the other hand, did fight. He went up to Megabyte and said....
Mike: Want some
candy?
Tom: Wanna go to the Star
Trek convention with me?
Crow: Do you find me
attractive?
Bob: Go kiss a
null!
Austin: Listen up you big jerk! It's time to die!
Bob: "...There's a time
to live. A time to die. A time to laugh and a time to cry..."
Mike: That was very nice,
Bob.
Bob: (proudly)
Thanks.
Megabyte: Oh yeah and why is that ?????
Bob: (Austin) Because my job is a fake, I'm stuck in a computer and I have nothing better to do.
Austin: Because I said so!!
Tom: (Megabyte) Oh...alright then, if you say so.
Issa: ...And Austin does the
'Stone Cold Stuner' on Megabyte knocking him out cold...
Bob: Glitch delete
mode!
Issa: ...And there goes Megabyte
forever
Bob: Megabyte gets a vacation? No fair!
Matrix: Very, very nice
Austin!
Bob: Very nice! I say let's
go for a drink at Al's Wait and Eat
Austin: Sounds good. Let's
go
Bob: He's got to be kidding. With a title like 'Wait and Eat'?
Issa: ...at Al's Wait and
Eat
Bob: Hi, I want two energy
shakes and what will you have Austin???
Bob: (Austin) Do they have those little shepherd's pie things with the spicy beef in the middle?
Austin: What's a energy shake
???!
Al's Waiter: An energy shake
is... well... energy.
Tom: This fic is...well... pointless!
Austin: Do you have any coke or coffee??!
Bob: No, they don't.
Al's Waiter: We have coffee
Bob: (holding his head) My head hurts....
Austin: Alright, I'll have that two sugar, please.
Crow: Wow. He's having two bowls of sugar! I'm impressed...
Al's Waiter: Ok Al, we need 2 energy shakes and one coffee!
All: 3...2...1...
Al: What ??????
Tom: Well, that wasn't predictable!
Al's Waiter: This will take time.
Bob: But let's decide: User time or Mainframe time.
Issa: Well, after 2 and a half macroseconds,
Bob: Ok, it's Mainframe time then.
they got their drinks and
then they went back to the Principal Office
Phong: Good job, guys, but
what took you so long?
Crow: (Bob) Matrix saw these pumps that he just had to have...
Bob: We went to get a
drink
Phong: Oh I see. So, what
happend??
Bob: Not much we saved mainframe
from total distruction and Austin here, gave Megabyte a sample of the so
called whoop@$$
All: (singing) ...We're living with BSnP!...
Phong: Great! I say, let's take a big vacation from all of this and maybe next time we will try to get Vince and Austin back home. That's not going to be easy.
Crow: Neither is reading this fic!
The End
All: YAY! (they begin to get up)
Issa: Wait!
Crow: No!
Tom: Why does he keep doing
that?
Where is Vince and what happend to AndrAIa??
Bob: No one cares. You
said 'The End'. We're out of here.
Mike: Besides, you're the
author. You tell us.
AndrAIa: Vince, what are you doing????
Mike: No...! I didn't
mean...!
Tom: Oh way-to-go, Mike!
Thanks a lot!
Crow: We were almost out
of here!
Bob: (pats Mike on the
shoulder) Don't worry, I'm sure he was going to continue
anyways.
Mike: Thanks Bob.
*sniff*
Vince: Uh... nothing...AndrAIa I'm just looking around...uh AndrAIa, what is that over there???
Crow: The exit?
AndrAIa: What??! Where ????
( BOOM!! )
Issa: Great! AndrAIa got it
right on the head!
Tom: (sarcastically) Whoopie.
Vince: Finally, this place will be mine but wait... AndrAIa will wake up and I'm dead...
Crow: I'd be grateful if you were dead.
ok ok What to do?
Tom: Kill yourself and save AndrAIa the trouble?
Wait... what is that?? A PC! Cool
Bob: He is in a
PC. (sigh) Mike, do you have any Tylenol?
Mike: In my room, I'll
get it when the next intermission happens... If the next intermission
happens that is...
The PC: Welcome. Please choose
a subject.
Vince: Uh... how to make someone
sleep forever ??
Mike: Work for Bill
Gates?
Bob: Sit through one of
Phong's speeches?
Tom: Make them read this
fic?
PC: You can make someone sleep by 'The Sleep Chamber'. The person will stay asleep until they are no longer in the room.
Mike: (Ralph) Sleep. That's where I'm a viking!
Vince: Perfect. Where is that
???
PC: Please follow the red
line on the floor.
Vince: Now that's a
guide!
Mike: (Vince) Great! Hey
wait! This leads to the bathroom...but...this... might not be so
bad...
Bob: Finally! A different
chapter title.
Crow & Tom:
Hurray!
Issa: Last time, we left Vince in the Principal Office without anyone to look after him. He was trying to get back to his city.
Mike: (Vince) I wonder what this one does. (presses a button and the core explodes) Oops. (walks off whistling innocently)
Vince: Now, how get I get out of this place? I wonder where this "guide" will take me.
Mike: (Chinese guide) Here sirs, we come to famous training ground of curse-ed springs. Jusenkyo!
Issa: After 1 nano going around the principal office they finally get to the forbiden place
All: (dramatically) Dum dum dum!
that only Phong can go.
Tom: Where no sprite has gone before....except for Phong.
PC: Sorry, you are not aloud in this room without the password.
Crow: Open Sesame!
Vince: Oh great, I can't get out of here.
Crow: Join the club!
Crap!
Tom: Wow! That's just what I was thinking! This guy is good!
PC: That's the password.
Enter
Vince: This is too
easy.
Bob: This is too sad.
(somewhere else)
Tom: (whining) Awwww! I've already seen (somewhere else)...
Phong: Bob, where is
Vince?
Bob: I don't know
Phong
Austin: I'll check,
Song
Mike: (singing) Song sung blue!...
Phong: That's Phong, Austin.
Mike: (Wakko) ...and that's Dot!
Austin: Yeah, that's what
I said
Phong: Whatever. Just
go.
Mike: (French accent) Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!
Austin: Ok
Issa: ...And Austin leaves
to find Vince.... 5 nanos later
Dot: Phong, you know last
time Megabyte was here?
Tom: (Phong) Lessee...Megabyte...Megabyte....nope, the name doesn't ring a bell.
My scanners picked up something strange.
Bob: (Phong)...Big, blue and furry with a big nose. I had to wash my scanners twenty times to get the smell out...
Austin: Uh guys, how can you get in the basement???
Bob: (Phong) We have a basement?
Mouse: Ah'll go with him. Come on, Austin
Tom: Oh sure! The author
can't use "too" correctly, but he gets Mouse's accent in?
Mike: Easy,
honey.
Austin: Ok
Issa: Great! Let's check out
what Vince is up to...
Mike: About
5'11.
Tom: Oh, that was bad
Mike...
Vince: Ok computer scan me and try to find out what I'm doing here and how can I get out of here???
Crow: So you think that
computer could help us?
Mike: Yeah, just like that
interocitor that Tom has. It didn't help one bit.
Bob: You have a working
interocitor?
PC: Scanning. I found that you are here for a reason and so is your friend, Austin
Bob: (PC) They are trying to get enough players to start up a system baseball league.
Vince: Just great!!! How can I get out off here?????
Mike: Second star to the right and straight on 'til morning.
PC: You must finish your mission in order to get out of here
Bob: (Vince) But there's no place like home... (starts tapping his heels together) ...no place like home...no place like home.
Vince: Mission????? Computer, what mission????
Crow: (announcer voice) Your mission: should you choose to accept it, is to find the plot for this fic.
Austin: VINCE!!! What are you doing???
Mike: (Blinkin) Guessing...I guess no one's coming....
Mouse: Phong, you better get down here now!!!
Bob: Oh leave Phong alone. He's short enough as it is...
Phong: Ok
Austin: What are you doing
with that computer??? Are you crazy??
All: Yes!
Are you trying to bust the whole system???
Mike: Crow, stop snickering, now!
Vince: No. I'm trying to out of here!
Bob: But the door is shut and I can't open doors.
Austin: Sure, Vince that's what they all say.
Bob: They do?
Mouse, get him.
Bob: Why doesn't Austin
get him? He's the wrestler.
Tom: Bob, think about that
for a minute. What does he actually do?
Bob: (thinks) Good
point.
Issa: ...And Mouse got him with that ring of hers
Bob: Got him
what?
Crow: A
G-String?
Tom: Her voice
teacher.
Mike: And the Mainframers
automatically do what Austin tells them, even though they don't really know
him and he's a User and he's a wrestler...
Mouse: This should keep him
until Phong gets here
Issa: Then out off no where
!!!!!!!!!BOOM!!!!!!!!!
Crow: The core exploded, Mainframe get deleted, everyone died. The end.
Mouse: What was that???!!!
Computer, stats???
Computer: There was a
big...
Bob: ...fat man! He sat on the Principal Office!
Mouse: A big what???
Bob: Fat man!
Mike & Bots: Na na
na na na na na na Fatman!
Issa: Then out of nowhere a vid window popped up
Tom: Mainframe has a special storage place for vid-windows called 'nowhere'.
Daemon: This is Daemon. I've got you friends.
Mike: (Daemon) Because I can't make friends on my own.
All of them and Mainframe is under my control
Tom: (Daemon) These hypnosis classes are working great!
surrender or I'll have to delete your friends
Bob: I know they're not perfect but that's a little extreme, don't you think?
Issa: Bumer !!!!!
Mike: Dude!
Tom: Finally! A title that I like!
Issa: Oh dear. This is not good. My whole story's could be over in a second if Daemon gets Bob code's.
Bob: That's a bad thing?
I have to help.
Mike: No you
don't.
Tom: This fic is
gone!
Bob: Six feet
under!
Crow: Sleeping with the
fishes!
Mike: Dead on
arrival!
Tom: Pushing up
daisies!
Bob: Resting in
pieces!
Bob: This is Guardian 452
of the system of Mainframe. Who are you?
Daemon: Shut up.
Mike: Boy! She had cruel parents.
I know what system this is and who you are, you are a pain in the rear end.
Tom: No. That's the cactus that you're sitting on.
Soon your codes and your system will be mine. Hahahahahaha!!!!
Mike: Hey, she laughs like Dot.
Matrix: You Witch!
Crow: (cackling) I'll get you my pretty! And your little null too!
This is our system and we will not give it up without a fight!
Mike: Negotiations are a possibility though.
Daemon: Very well, I will give you your chance to defend your selves. This will not take long. Hahahahahaha!!!
Crow: (hopefully) Did you hear that Mike? It won't take long. It won't take long. (starts to laugh insanely)
Austin: Do you have to keep laughting like that?
Bob: Does everybody have to laugh like that?
Daemon in a BIG voice says:
YES!
Austin: Ok,
sorry.
Bob: No you're not!
Computer: Warning, incoming
game! Warning, incoming game!
Daemon: Good luck Losers!
This is a class 12 game! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha
Crow: Bob, is there such
a thing as a class twelve game?
Bob: No.
Crow: Thought so. (turns
to Tom) Pay up.
Austin: Just great! A class
12 game, now we are in for it!! Uh Bob, what is a class 12
game???
Bob: Trust me Austin, you
don't want to know!
Bob: Yes he does.
Austin: Come on, tell please, pretty please!
Mike: With a cherry on top? (whining) I'll be your friend...
Matrix: Austin, what is wrong with you?
Crow: Ever since that surgery, he just hasn't been the same.
Austin: Sorry.
Bob: No you're not!
Bob: We must finish this game
without being deleted. Let's go wait Glitch, where is the game going to
land?
Glitch: In Floating
Point
Tom: (announcer voice) That's right kids! Now, new talking Glitch. It's not just bleeps and clicks any more.
Bob: Perfect! Let's
go!
Issa: Guys! Wait! Too
late
Mike: He's a poet and doesn't know it.
( And our heros go in the game. What will hapend to them? Well, we will find out after this break )
Tom: (makes breaking
sounds)
Crow: ...And we're
back!
TV Guy: Are you tired having fast food all the time? Well, don't wait any more. Come and see us at Al's Diner where fast food is not a problem. Come now.
Tom: (thinking out
loud) "Well, don't wait any more."?
Bob: Don't wait any more.
Just wait longer!
Other TV Guy: Hi! Are your insurance company letting you down? Well, come to...
Tom: ...Our company where we drop up from 30,000 feet.
Issa: Ok. Ok, stop this show. I'm writting a story.
Bob: Well, not much of
one.
Mike: We're not stopping
you...though we wish you would.
Who put this in the
story?
TV Guy: Well, Issa. Your cousin
typed this...
Tom: Fic writting - Now a family past time. Get the entire family involved!
Issa: Ok, let's finish this story...
Crow: Oh, yes please!
(when we left our heros them where in a game )
Tom: Who taught you to speak gooder English?
Bob: glicht stats?
Mike: He's not sure.
Bob: This is a war type of game.
Tom: (Bob) There is a tank
type thing...
Crow: (Bob) ...and a large
rocket launcher type thing...
Mike: (Bob) ...and a loaded
jet type thing...
Bob: (Bob) ...all pointed
at me.
Let's ReBoot and we will see what we get.
Mike: (Bob) I hope I get that little rabbit in that chocolate egg. It's the only one I'm missing in the set.
(and Bob and Matrix say ReBoot
at the same time )
Austin: Cool! Let me try that!
REBOOT!!!
Austin:
REBOOT!!!
Austin: Hello? REBOOT
!!!!
Crow: AAHHH! Now there's
three of them!
Tom: It's Mulitplicity
all over again!
Bob: Sorry Austin. You can't
ReBoot like us. You need a icon
Austin: What is a
icon?
Mike: icon, i kon' n. 1.
image; sacred picture. 2. little pin thingy that you attach to your clothes
to do really cool things with your wardrobe.
Tom: Mike, you've been
reading the dictionary again, haven't you?
Mike: How'd ya
guess?
Bob: There will be lots of
time to tell you when we get back to Mainframe. Now let's finish this
game.
Daemon: Perfect! Now they're
in the game. That should give me some time to prepare the attack on
your friend, Phong Hahahahahaha!!!!!!
Phong: We will fight you,
Daemon.
Tom: (Phong) Now come here so I can hit you with my little stick arms and give you the beating of a lifetime.
Daemon: Shut up, you old peace of trash!
Mike: (Phong) Ok, who didn't take out the garbage?
Robot, get him!!
Bob: Get him
what?
Crow: Legs?
Mike: Glasses that stay
on his nose?
Phong: No no Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!
Bob: Barney!
Mike: The one armed
man!
Tom: Telly
Tubbies!
Crow: Oh the
inhumanity!!!!
Dot: PHONG!!!!!!!!!! Leave him alone you big jerk!
Tom: (singing) You jerk! You are such a jerk! ...
Daemon: Oh no! Dot is mad at me! I'm so scared! Please don't be mad at me, please! Hahahahahaha!!!
Crow: What? Daemon is actually scared? Oh...I see...that's sarcasm.
AndrAIa: What was that ??
Crow: Sarcasm. I didn't get it either the first time.
Vince: I don't know and I don't care.
Tom: Kinda like this fic. I don't know what it is and don't care!
Issa: Forgot to tell you... AndrAIa got up from the chamber and attacked Vince.
Bob: Plot hole! Plot hole!
Now Vince is all tide up.
Mike: Now, is that a reference to the ocean, or to a discount laundry detergent?
Loser
Vince: I heard
that!
Crow: Yeah? What are you going to do about it 'Mr. Clean'?
Issa: So, what you goin to
get me? You have been beat up by a girl, Vince. Hahahahahaha!! You are a
loser!
Vince: I'll get you for this,
I promise. As soon as this story is over
Bob: Is he talking to us, or the author?
Issa: Ok then I'll just make the story longer. It's not The Beginning of the End any more. It's the Beginning of the End Part 1 Hahahaha!!!!!!
Tom: (yelling) You
evil evil author! How could you do this to us...again?
Crow: I say we sue him
for false advertising!
Bob: Sounds good to
me.
Mike: How 'bout just beat
him with a big stick?
Vince: Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I hate you!!!!!!!!
Crow: The feeling is mutual.
AndrAIa: Oh please stop it
you kids! Now we need to get out of here before Daemon finds
us.
Daemon: Wait a minute! When
I scan the Principal Office before I took over, there were six people. There
are 2 people missing.
Mike: So, was that eight people originally or only six?
Robot, find the missing person and get them here, ok?
Bob: (Daemon) I scanned two people but just bring me the one who owes me money.
Robot: Yes sir! Right away
sir and let me say it is a pleasure to work for....
Daemon: Move!!
Bob: Hey! She has Sargent
Smiley working for her now.
Tom: Who?
Robot: Yes sir.
( 10 minutes later
)
Bob: Everyone died.
AndrAIa: So are you two going to help me or fight all day?
Tom and Crow: Fight.
Robot: They must be here somewhere. You go there and I'll look in the computer room
Tom: Don't you mean (somewhere else)?
AndrAIa: Oh no! We're trapped!!
Bob: (AndrAIa) I'm stuck in here with two basic guys! Kill me now!
Robot: Found them! Freeze and no one will be killed... for now.
Tom: ...now on the other
hand...
Crow: Let the genicide
begin!
( Is it the the end to AndrAIa, Vince and Issa?
Crow: Would that make the story end sooner?
Well tune in next time. same ReBoot fic, same ReBoot website )
Crow: I loved
BOOTMAN!
Mike: Yeah, too bad we're
not reading that story instead of this one.
(Back in the SOL, Bob is pacing back and forth, rubbing his temples.)
Crow: What's the matter Bob?
Bob: This fic is giving me a splitting headache. It's so... BASIC, I can't stand it. Mike's getting me some Advil though.
(Mike walks in with a bottle of Advil. He dumps two out of the bottle and offers them to Bob. Bob takes the bottle instead and runs off screen.)
Mike: (confused) Bob? What are you doing? Why did you take the... whole... bottle? (He stops and realizes something.) Bob! Don't do it! Sucide is not the answer!
Gypsy: (rolling on screen in the background after Bob) That's the easy way out! If you commit suicide, that means Megabyte wins!
Tom: We won't let you do it! (take off after Bob)
Crow: Besides, you have to stay here and suffer just like the rest of us! (goes off screen after Bob)
Bob: (runs back on screen away from all the bots chasing him. Crow has attached himself to Bob's arm.) What in the Net are you talking about? I'm not commiting suicide. I'm just taking the bottle into the theater so I'll have it on hand, cause I know I'll need it later!
Mike: Oh... Good plan.
(Lights and sirens go off)
All: We've got Movie sign!!!